You don’t pay attention to body language
If you’re oblivious to the reactions of people around you, it could lead to trouble. “Insensitive people tend to be blind to social subtleties and innuendos. They don’t seem to understand that they’re actually insensitive, so they miss the cues that would normally send a message that they should alter their behavior,” says Howard Gurr, PhD, DCC, a psychologist in the New York City area. If it seems like your friends are frequently standoffish after a conversation or are giving you funny looks that seem out of place to you, that could be a sign you’ve said something inappropriate or offensive. Instead of ignoring the looks, try asking them if they’re OK or if you’ve said something wrong. Don’t miss these other easy ways to be nicer to people.
You raise your voice
Take a step back and think about your last few conversations; if you remember doing the majority of the talking, you likely acted insensitively. “Insensitive people resort to standard techniques to get other people to hear them, which is only more of the same and frustrating because it doesn’t work,” says Gurr. Try to pay closer attention to your own behavior during a conversation; any time realize you’ve raised your voice or interrupted others to get your point across, stop yourself and make a mental note to avoid it next time it’s your turn to speak. (Learn how to tell if you’re a bad listener.)
You aren’t open to other opinions
“Insensitive people are more involved in themselves; they’re threatened by other people’s needs or thoughts because they think their own needs aren’t going to be met,” says Gurr. Remind yourself that your opinion isn’t the only right one. Instead of expressing yourself at all costs, try asking other people what they think about something; this will help keep the conversation a two-way conversation instead of all about you, you, you. Don’t miss these 12 signs you’re dealing with a narcissist.