Quit the blame game
When something goes wrong, we naturally start looking for a person to blame—and that person is often ourselves. But feeling guilty won’t help the situation. Remember that the world is complex, and often a whole series of events contributed to what went wrong, explains Fran Walfish, a psychotherapist in Beverly Hills, CA, and a consultant on The Doctors. Don’t bear (or assign) all the blame for the outcome, but accept that bad things happen, no matter how hard you try. Try these 28 tiny pick-me-ups for when you’re having the worst day ever.
Get to the root of your guilt
Do some soul-searching and figure out why you’re feeling guilty (this, as opposed to ruminating over it), says Jameela Jackson, a counselor and marriage and family therapist in North Little Rock, AR. If you feel like you should be volunteering at your kids’ school more, ask yourself why you haven’t. Have other parents made comments that make you feel like you’re not doing enough? Does the thought of reading out loud give you anxiety, but you’d happily help with snack duty at a class party? You know what’s best for you and your family, so getting to the bottom of your guilt will help you find an effective way to address what you anything you need to.