You may need to put a little more work into it
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You can thank declines in hormone levels for the fact that you may not be ready to go at a moment’s notice. “Both men and women deal with hormone changes in their 40s that can cause changes in sexual arousal, desire and general physical comfort during sexual activity,” says Shannon Chavez, a licensed psychologist and certified sex therapist in Los Angeles, CA. “Changes in hormones may require an increase in stimulation during sexual activity or increased focus on sensual pleasuring in order to get aroused.” If you’re really missing feeling desire, you’re not helpless; start with these 20 ways you can improve your sex life in just one day.
You may be wilder in the sack
Think you’re in for the same old, same old if you’re in a long-term relationship? Think again—that’s just one of the 8 popular myths about aging. “Couples in their 40s are having some of the best sex of their lives—they have more permission and motivation to explore different aspects of sexuality,” Chavez says. “Couples may try kink, role play, watch erotica together, open their relationship or try Tantra in their 40s. Couples are more open to exploring at this age due to sexual confidence, a stronger sense of sexual self, desire to make sex more playful, or feeling deeper emotional bonding for more meaningful and passionate sex.”